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Hello Ladies!

Written by Gearóid • February 01 2008 • 7 comments

As you are no doubt aware, the Fake Dog men went to a wrestling show in Salthill last night. As expected, it was packed with screaming fans, and Fake Dog was right up the front to witness it all!

First up was The Highlander Lou McDonald, with his big keg, against “Bad News” … great names, we were very impressed! Since we weren’t terribly sure who was good or bad, the big fat man got the microphone and started going off on Galway and Ireland. Well he’s not from around here and has his own customs and traditions, so he just had to be booed. Of course, we at Fake Dog are never ones to go with the popular guy, so we became The Highlander’s biggest fans!

Well it was a pretty slow-going match until The Highlander suddenly won, and I’m not really sure how it happened, but we were happy.

Next up were the ladies. We were excited about this one. And it didn’t disappoint! There was one from London, and a very Irish girl from Mallow … well I think she was Irish, it was hard to tell.

I’m joking of course. Her name was Erin, she wore green clothes with a shamrock on them, waved a tri-colour and came out to some U2 song which I don’t recall. It was quite a good match, better than the first in any case. Like a lot of wrestling matches, the most fun lies in the subtleties. In this match, the London woman was beating up Erin and shouted, “This is how we do it in Britain!” It sounded like they beat up little Irish girls over there. Who knows. In any case, Erin won with an impressive missle dropkick behind chants of “Ireland! Ireland!” as the fate of our entire nation clearly lay in this match. It did. And we won!

The match after was a very big man who said he was better than us against a guy called Celtic Warrior, who didn’t seem terribly Irish. Anyway, however it happened, the Warrior won the match and the cheapish-looking yellow title belt.

This brought us to the intermission when I went out to get refreshments for the Fake Dog crew. During that time, some kids went near the ring and got chased away by the referee. It was amusing.

After the break, it was time for a Batista look-alike (whom I christened Botista) versus Gangrel, who used to actually wrestle in WWE, which is kinda cool, except he sucked and was fired for being fat. He won the match with a harsh low blow, which is surely because he runs the show being a minorly important person in wrestling.

Finally was the royal rumble, which seemed to promise 20 contestants, but was actually only the 8 whom we had already seen. Botista won and the crowd loved it.

Fake Dog then went to get food and subsequently went to see So Cow in Róisín Dubh.

And so that concludes my synopsis of the night. Dara and Paul have their own opinions to post too, and we’ll have photos up in the gallery in the coming days, so keep your eyes open!

— Gearóid

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